I've been busy. but I'm not going to apologize. and I'm not going to explain how crazy things have been. because that's not what life should be about. i should not have to defend my actions or lack of attendance with people and groups and at places. I should not have to deal with being told that I HAVE to invite my ex boyfriend out for my birthday when I'm uncomfortable with him being there and as much as my current boyfriend denies it he too is not comfortable with it. I should not have to get upset with my best friend because she won't listen when I say I'm not comfortable going to the bar my friends go to every week. and I should not be told that I cannot have the people at dinner for my birthday that I want there. Its bad enough i picked a cheap place knowing that she can't afford a whole lot.
so basically...i have drama again with my group of friends who i became friends with because of my ex boyfriend. I've spoken about the group before and how when him and i were together all we did was group stuff. and now the group expects me to be out wherever and whenever they are, but honestly it's wearing....how many times can i go to the same bar and listen to them sing the same karaoke songs and watch the same fools act stupid when they're drunk!? AND not for anything...on a Friday when I've worked all week i don't want to do anything but lay in bed and cuddle with my boyfriend. OR on a Saturday actually go out with him on a date without 15 other people. no one understands how much i hated having to do what the group was doing for so long and now im loving that yes we do things with both his friends and mine but we have our own agenda. I'm SO sick of the "group" mentality.
So of course my big 25th birthday is coming up---which honestly I was excited about but now as time draws closer i am SO not excited. getting older sucks especially when you think about when you were 18 and had all of these goals for when you were 25 and NONE of them have been fulfilled. really frustrating.
ok. enugh moaning and whining. gotta go teach again. hope everyone of my blogger buddies is well.
Black Lives Matter
6 years ago
2 comments:
Sorry to break it to you, but you're growing up. Next thing you know that boyfriend will be proposing. I always think it's so funny because I don't feel any diffent than the girl I remember playing A.sshole or some other drinking game.
HI hun!! I'm so excited to have gotten to the point where I can sit comfortably with my boyfriend on a Friday night at the diner and when he asks me what I want to do for the rest of the night say "nothing but lay in your bed curled up" of course I wish it were our bed but i'm not pushing anything. Especially that proposal. I'm actually looking to buy new bedroom furniture and he asked what my mom expects me to do with all of teh money she took from me when i was a kid and saved and i told him I think its to pay for my wedding, to which he responded "WHOA...what wedding? we're not getting married" which the last time we had this conversation ended with me staying up all night until i finally cried about how he doesn't want to marry me and he responded with "not now." I think he needs a kick in the ass when the time comes but right now its too soon. not to say I don't think about it. I'd give anything to spend the rest of my life with him. <3 aww. i know. i'm a mush.
anywho...as far as becomming a grown up...i've been enjoying it and I'm so sick of the BS drama of my so called friends. sigh.
hope all is well with you!
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